It’s been a little rough around here lately.
After getting my positive biopsy results, I received my Synthroid prescription and have been battling the side effects ever since. I think my mood swings are rubbing off on my Mom, too.
Lately, she has started getting up and going through her morning routine while I am still asleep. She did so last week and into this week. This morning she was yelling for me at 6:40am because she didn’t remember how to turn the water on. Then at 8 she was yelling “is anyone else in the house?!” When I came out, she had the wrong channel on the TV (she watches CNN) and couldn’t get it right.
Sometimes, when I get frustrated I want to cry. I won’t let myself yell at her: that wouldn’t help. It would just upset her. But I spend a lot of time with my feelings bottled up. I resent the situation I’m in, which I suppose is natural. But that resentment turns into guilt and then I just start to well up. It’s impossible to rationalize the situation, because my Mom’s brain can’t follow my explanations.
I think she’s been feeling low lately because I’ve been going into NYC for job interviews and she’s been home alone longer. I know my Dad wants to bring someone in, but he’s not ready to do it until I’m actually working full time. But I know we’ll need to start before then so we can slowly introduce this new person into Mom’s life.
Just Try To Remember 